I have a rant. I know, BIG SURPRISE right? Brittney has a complaint. No but seriously, it’s a rant I’ve been meaning to vent for quite some time and it’s about the very thing I’m ranting on: blogs.
Waaaay back when I started this adventure, blogs were online diaries. They were public views into people’s lives, and sometimes you found someone you could relate to and sometimes you didn’t. You got to know people, get a feel for them and even make friendships. You checked in with their adventures and watched them grow. We didn’t have comment capabilities, so most of the time we had zero idea who was reading us unless we had a hits counter — and that didn’t stop us from writing. If we wanted to communicate with the blogger, we emailed. Or utilized instant messaging. When comment scripts were introduced, you commented because you had something to say about the subject. If you talked about a product, it was because you liked it and found it worth sharing. Sometimes your posts were well-planned and lengthy; sometimes they were short, sporadic and oozing typos. It didn’t matter. You posted all sorts of topics that may have not related to each other and varied in their writing styles — and it was totally acceptable. It was even fun.
Tangent: When I was 15, a friend of mine and I won a trip to San Francisco courtesy of AOL and PluggedIn Media thanks to our blogs. A company was focusing on upcoming teen marketing strategies and wanted our input. We went to some big conference where we chimed in with our thoughts on what approaches would work. I didn’t even realize then that marketing gurus had begun to realize blogging would become a fantastic media/marketing outlet. I even remember when another group of my good friends (like Nicole) were all flown to another big event and paid to begin posting about a soda. I think that was my first experience reading paid posts — which are EVERYWHERE now.
Back to my rant: Blogging is a whole ball game now. There’s an endless supply of us and it feels like a fight to come out on top. Self-branding is what you do if you’re going to “make it” and we are told we need to claim our stake in every upcoming social media tool to even be relevant (which, when you have a job, school and hobbies, starts to feel more like a sink than a swim). More and more recently, I’ve been seeing blog posts on how to blog and I find it disheartening. There should not be rules to blogging. That’s why this was fun to begin with.
Don’t get me wrong — there are definitely some awesome blogging tips we could all use. Things like easily read fonts, organized entries and improving your story-telling skills. Tips on engaging readers. The list goes on and on… but I’ve been seeing a lot of posts about what not to blog. Don’t blog long entries (because apparently, people reading blogs don’t actually want to read them). Don’t blog about your day (because I didn’t come to YOUR blog to learn about YOU). Don’t blog unless it takes you three hours to write out your thought. Always ask a question at the bottom. Do this, do that, don’t do this, avoid that. They may be great suggestions to gaining readership — and I’d be a fool to say I blog STRICTLY for myself and don’t enjoy the feedback, because if I didn’t enjoy feedback, I’d have a handwritten diary that no one could view — but it still saddens me.
Yes, believe it or not, I blog MOSTLY for myself. I love the community, the feedback, the conversations, the friendship. It’s why I stay public – but what I write is me. It isn’t edited toward a specific audience, I don’t spend hours prepping my entry (and yes, I realize you can TOTALLY tell, lol). Maybe it affects my readership, maybe some folks find it unorganized and boring, but one thing it most definitely is.. is myself. I have met endless people from the interwebs, and the one repeating observation is, “Wow! You talk JUST how you type!” — and I find that to be AWESOME.
So lately, being swarmed from all directions on how I am “supposed” to be blogging, I’ve almost wanted to give it up. It’s zapping the fun out of blogging, it’s making it stressful and a chore; and who needs a HOBBY that adds STRESS? I think we all get enough of that between school and work! 
BE YOURSELF.
That’s the one tidbit I would love to offer to bloggers. Have something lengthy to write? WRITE IT. It’s not hard to read a long post, and if I don’t like it, I can scroll past. Want to tell me what your lunch was and what’s going down in your corner of the world? AWESOME. I’m THERE because I want to know you about YOU. Nothing is more frustrating for me than initially liking a blog and watching it develop into a giant commercial pushing the writer on me. Find me here! Watch me here! Buy me here! I don’t need to be sold you, I’m already there. Or watching a blog morph into an attempt at gaining the most readers by saying whatever it is the blogger feels will accomplish that — even when you can tell that style/thought isn’t who the writer really is. I have even recently found myself feeding into this — and I’ve decided tough cookies, if I want to post about boring conversations you won’t find hilarious or the fact I got snot on my glasses, I’m going to!
Forgive me, and I may be a complete rarity, but I miss the personal/intimate side of blogging. It just seems that if we all follow these rules on what to blog, what not to blog, how to write, what to say, what not to say, what topic to avoid, what tone to use, what length to adhere to… then there will be very little point in my reading multiple blogs because we will all be the same exact person and I can just go to a single blog for everything. I like reading REAL blogs, with REAL bloggers writing them. I won’t stop reading your blog if your life doesn’t seem perfect, if your home didn’t just step out of Martha Stuart Living, if you have a zit, if you regularly consume obscene amounts of fast food, if you own exactly one pair of jeans that still fit and wear them for weeks on end (coughMEcough). In fact, I will probably like it MORE because you’re willing to be honest, vulnerable and human.
I really wasn’t sure where I was going here, except to say that I want us to be ourselves and be okay with that. Blogging is growing into this awesome outlet, which rocks, but it’s also becoming home to 45243 writers who are creating fake personas for the sake of popularity or marketing and in turn, it’s losing it’s unique-ness. Or something…. ::blank stare:: I’m going to go finish my coffee now. =)
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I think it’s so interesting, because part of this is also where you hang out online! In the past weeks I’ve read no blogs that aren’t personal, are about how to or how not to write, or that aren’t ‘real’. One of the things that (I think) is key, is making sure that what you’re reading reflects what you want your experience to be- and from the sounds of it your blog shouldn’t just be fun, but your google reader should be too =)
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 11:45 am
You know, though, I’ve seen it pop up on blogs that are routinely personal. Or have watched blogs that WERE cool morph into it. Maybe I’m just a grump today LOL. But oddly enough it seems to appear less on blogs I randomly locate that aren’t part of big networks and more on those that are?
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Kyla Roma Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 11:48 am
Yikes, I’m glad I don’t have those in my reader!
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 11:49 am
LOL right? Maybe this sparked because I was cleaning up my reader yesterday?
“More and more recently, I’ve been seeing blog posts on how to blog and I find it disheartening. There should not be rules to blogging. That’s why this was fun to begin with.”
I KNOW. I’m in a love-hate relationship with blogging these days. I love it because I love to write, period. I love to put thought and time into something that’s one of my only hobbies, that helps me develop my writing skills and most importantly meet awesome people like YOU. But I also hate it because of reasons like those you listed. It seems once people reach a certain status level of “uber blogger” with 70 comments on each post, they feel like they’re now an expert and should naturally write about how to “do well” in the blogging world. Market yourself! Join 20SB and comment in every single discussion! Get an iPhone so you can comment all day long! I don’t WANT it to take over my life in order to “do well”. And who defines “success” in blogging anyway? If I write and I have three people comment, I’m not going to beat myself up about being an online Billy No Mates. I write primarily because I love it. Secondarily to document my journey through life, through my goals and feelings along the journey to achieving them. Thirdly to put myself and my struggles and successes out there and hope that if someone reads that’s gone through something similar, maybe they’ll just find the inspiration that they can get through it too. And fourthly to keep in touch with people I’m not lucky enough to live nearby to visit. *Cough YOU*
Thank you for putting this out there, I agree with you 100%.
And I totally own one pair of jeans (that were hand me downs in the first place) and wear them for days on end
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 11:48 am
“Secondarily to document my journey through life, through my goals and feelings along the journey to achieving them. Thirdly to put myself and my struggles and successes out there and hope that if someone reads that’s gone through something similar, maybe they’ll just find the inspiration that they can get through it too. And fourthly to keep in touch with people I’m not lucky enough to live nearby to visit. *Cough YOU*”
Honestly, exactly. It’s like you live right here in my brain. You and Kyla. Right there. Next to my ears and eyeballs and stuff. <3 I love to go back through my own blog and go AHAHAHAHAHA oh, I’m odd.
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Emily Jane Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 12:39 pm
But that’s why we love you
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Can I just respost your post in the comment and say EXACTLY!?
I’m using your post for inspiration for my next one. I’ll credit you and your fanciness.
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OH wow….well lady AMEN. You know how I completely agree with you. COMPLETELY. And I want to copy and paste Emilys comment right down here. The pressure…it just shouldn’t be there. Sometimes I read blogs about how to blog…and I’m like WHY ARENT THEY BLOGGING, then?! But that’s just me. Suddenly, everyone is a social media expert…but I wonder if they are more social media slaves.
Keep being you. I like you a lot.
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YES! i’ve seen that a lot lately. it’s a sure fire way for me to say, no thanks. it seems to be geared toward putting others down. sad. good post, lady
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 12:05 pm
Thank you! And it starts to feel that way when things stop being worded as, “Here is what seems to be working for me, since you asked..” verses “Here’s how to be JUST like ME, and don’t do anything otherwise or it’ll blow.” LOL
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I always find it so refreshing when I find people who are writing genuinely, and from their heart. I don’t follow an equation or a “how-to”: I just write what I’m thinking about. I think that being yourself online (and off) really is the key to being “successful” in blogging. Great post.
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Simply refreshing. And one of the reasons I am picky about who I read. Blogging should be about your life, and as a reader I am looking to find people with lives I can relate to, people that have similar interests as me, and can also share their fun adventures. A REAL PERSON. So damn the man, save the Empire! I’ll keep reading about snot on your glasses.
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I agree. I have seen some with what to do and what not to do, but I really just write for me. They are the books I like and storys I want to tell. If they don’t want to read it thats good with me. Peace my animal lovin/Mark Twain quotin/Dr. Suess stalkin sista from anotha motha
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I. F-CKING. HEART YOU.
This post is a revelation. A breath of fresh air. A voice of reason among insanity. (And I am apparently a whole list of cliches.
)
It’s so easy to get caught up in this I-must-be-a-top-blogger or I-must-build-a-platform or I-must-have-40-billion-readers thing. I find myself leaning that way all the time. Then I sort of mentally slap myself, because I believe you are right: BLOGGING SHOULD BE FUN.
Now my cheeks can thank you, though. Instead of slapping myself, I’m just going to come back and read this post again.
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 1:42 pm
“(And I am apparently a whole list of cliches. )”
Toooootally spit carrot all over my keyboard laughing at that, btw.
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Hi! I’m coming over this way via a tweet from ManderzMusings. I can really relate to this post. I went on a massive twitter unfollowing and facebook unfriending a few weeks ago and in dire need of cleaning out my reader. Over the course of the past few years I’ve ended up with a Google Reader full of blogs that I end up hitting “mark all as read” on. I agree with Kyla, it is about where you hang out and I need to clean that up some. Personally, I need a connection to bloggers– those I read, those who read mine, etc.
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 1:42 pm
Dittos. I’m doing the same thing.. where I kind of go.. if I routinely don’t enjoy reading this blog.. why am I here?
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This post pretty much sums up all my thoughts I have been having lately. There a lot of blogs out there that are just written to gain more readers, to become more famous, to make more money with… While those things are probably a nice outcome when becoming one of those bloggers you just have to have in your google reader, the blog needs to stay personal. I dislike blogs that are catered to the audience. I usually just click past them. When I read blogs, I want to read about that person’s life. I want to write what he or she feels and has been up to. Those are the blogs that keep sticking around in my google reader.
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i just want to say i loved this post and i totally agree
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I love this post. And I love you. So much so that I am seriously considering putting off my wedding for another year to ensure that I can come meet you (and your zoo).
But really, this post just sent off a spree of “aha” moments and memories all across my brain. So many that it’s hard to focus on making this make sense. And I plan to bookmark, and all sorts of other social media things to this post so that I can refer back to it. Yea, it’s that good.
When I switched to my domain, I tried to listen to many of those “how to” posts set out by the “famous” bloggers. After all, I want(ed) to be popular. But then blogging became a huge struggle. My posts weren’t developed enough, they didn’t appeal to an audience, blah, blah, blah. I felt like a huge failure. Even trying to get involved with social media meant I was dedicating time to staying on top of that instead of cuddling with my man and my pups.
One of those “aha” moments was realizing that so many of the bloggers I try (and fail) to emulate are being themselves. They are sincere, or funny, or descriptive, or whatever. Their greatness comes from them being true to themselves!
I look back at some of my old blogs (namely Nexopia) and how REAL I was. How I never censored myself. How natural writing was. And I want that back. I don’t want writing to be a struggle. Besides, if I think about it, I’d rather have readers that like me for me, not for who I pretend to be. (Not that I’m pretending, but I don’t usually write how I talk or think.) Lately I write with the thought in the back of my head that my grandma reads my blog. Whether she still does, I don’t know, but it certainly makes me not post a lot of the stuff that I want to. But I can’t let that stop me (especially since she’s a “special” one who’ll get mad over the littlest things).
And I’ve totally lost my train of thought (my Blackberry makes that happen much too often when commenting or writing). So, I’ll thank you again.
PS I own like 4 pairs of “good” jeans and 3 “bad” – but I will normally wear them without washing for weeks on end. Usually only washing them when they’re visibly dirty. Or stretched a bit too much.
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First – you do write exactly how you talk and I LOVE IT!
Second – you are my blogging guru and I have just started in this little game, but I agree. Write what you want and how you want. I want to hear your stories about boogs on your glasses and Bailey’s red rocket (have you written about this yet, because I am sure you could do a year in photos of it! hahaha)
Third – I love you!
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 2:06 pm
You did NOT just tell me to write about Bailey’s red rocket. AND I HAVEN’T. But now I’ll have to make it a weekly series. “This Week in Bailey’s Weiner…” just for you.
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I have to admit I always feel like I need to do more for my blog which is totally silly because I started my blog for me/by me and about me. That’s what a blog is. I like to be funny or sad, insightful or just plain silly depending on the day. I never edit my posts (seriously, unless I see a typo, I don’t go back to it!) either.
I still comment because I like the person, like their blog and in all seriousness want to be friends with them even if it’s across the interwebs.
All this to say: you rock for posting this. It should be more fun and less serious.
I’ll try to go that route too
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This is totally inspirational.
I think it’s sooo important to just be ourselves on our blogs! I think that blogging should be fun & stress RELIEVING, not stress INDUCING. You know? Great post! <3
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Umm, your blog was too long, so I didn’t read it. And you didn’t ask a question at the bottom. WTF is that???
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 4:22 pm
UHM. I love you.
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New reader to your blog, I absolutely agree with Emily about what she said.
I feel that there is no point of being involved enough, and I simply do not have that time to dedicate to the blogging section in my life (and I don’t expect I ever will, unless I stay unemployed for a while after graduating).
I started a new (more anonymous) blog recently, and I feel torn between wanting to gain a readership and simply blogging the way I do (and always did) which I know will never make me a popular blogger. On the other hand, I do think my writing could improve and I could learn how to be more reflective and less descriptive.
But you know, I find it all very stressful to try to adhere to all these rules, all just to get a few more comments. And more importantly, unnatural. I find that I like blogging on the weekend but no one actually reads blogs on the weekend. Etc.
Thanks for writing this post. It is good to know that there is another side (one closer to how I feel about blogging) to this thing.
P.S. I heart your blog layout, pink and turquoise are two of my favorite colors.
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Brittney Reply:
March 2nd, 2010 at 4:24 pm
RIGHT? Best colors ever. I think they should marry and run off to the sunset together.
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I here you!! I tend to blog about what I want to blog about, regardless of who is reading. Sometimes I get put off blogs if they write too little about their personal life, and use their blog for commercial gain – it bores me. Personal blogs should be personal, not a corporate business
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I couldn’t agree with you more. I have become the “blogging and social media expert” at work (my job title is graphic designer and this was recently thrown at me) I started a company blog, twitter, facebook, etc. all in an effort to gain more traffic to our company website. It sucks and I absolutely hate doing it because I feel it’s all being done for the wrong reasons, but I see more of it everyday. In the down economy, people are trying whatever they can do to make a buck. Blogging is not like what it was before, but all we can do is try to be ourselves and establish connections with people that we find interesting just like we always have. Seems like you are doing just that
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This post came into my life at the most perfect moment imaginable.
Tonight, I was on twitter, and lamenting about my lack of readership, and beating myself up over the fact that I haven’t posted since Friday and OMG HOW WILL I BECOME A FAMOUS BLOGGER IF I DON’T POST!?! While I wouldn’t MIND being a famous blogger – that’s not why I started. I started blogging as an outlet for my angsty emotions when I had my first boyfriend! I blogged my drunken adventures in college so I could keep track! I crafted open (and scathing) letters to the boy who broke up with me! I started blogging so I would have a place for ME!
But now, it seems like everyone is paid and sponsored and it starts to feel like you’re not worth your blogging salt unless you’re getting money for your words.
I felt really lost today – I’m really glad I found this.
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Maybe I’m just a narcissistic asshole but I blog for myself. Sure, I may step out and talk about other things but my blog is still pretty much ME, ME, ME.
Don’t see that changing anytime soon.
In the words of Wanda Sykes, “Im’a be me.”
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Sometimes blogging feels like a chore but I do it because I love writing and sharing my day to day experience with others. I have a personal blog that I write very personal stuff (aka bitching about people) in a private setting for advice and support and now that I’ve started this public blog I’ve been surprised at the difference in support. One is a trusting community where we share and converse, the other is sporadic comments without a lot of depth, and part of that could be newness, but still. Another thing I noticed is that people told me if I use a random tag for weird things that happen I am equated to a 12 year old girl and that I need to talk about just one topic. I’m sorry but leaving at just one topic is Boring. I’m so much more than just one topic and like to think others could live vicariously through me, even if it’s a conceited and narcissistic thought, as I do through them. Especially awesome mommy blogs that talk about identity, weight, health, food, in-laws, family issues, and babies. You go tell them to narrow their topic haters and we’ll see what can of whoop ass they open up on ya.
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Brittney Reply:
March 3rd, 2010 at 10:02 am
Right? Like, I keep thinking.. I need one style. And then I thought.. I’m random and a melting pot of topics, so.. that IS my style.
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Love this. Love you.
As we’ve talked, you know exactly how I feel. And it’s exactly what you’ve written here. I’ve been reluctant to write because I’ve felt that there is a certain procedure I need to follow and specific criteria that needs to be present in my entries.
Thank you for being brave and writing this down.
Love, love, love you!! xoxo
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Amen! That is all I have to say.
Oh..and thank you so much for posting this. I agree 100%. You rock
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Ugh not to mention some comments can be pretty insincere too. You’re right on we should blog about whatever we want, whenever we want. Sure I’m gonna be annoyed if some people post multiple times a day but it’s their blog. If I don’t like it, I can always unfollow.
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this makes me feel validated for my silly little blog. i <3 it, and never want to change for the masses
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Brittney Reply:
March 4th, 2010 at 9:24 am
I love your silly little blog.
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Here here!
Nice work!
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I blog for myself too. Like I am sure most people don’t really care about how my attempt to better my life is going, but I care and I need a voice for myself. So, I say more power to you, besides you’re hilarious and I completely heart your blog. So Rock On Miss Brittney.
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I just found you via Emily’s blog, and spent the last half hour or so cruising around your blog, and–this might be weird, but–I think I love you.
But I wanted to comment on this post especially because I also journaled online in high school (in the late 90s–eek!), went through a few domains and personal websites, etc. Then I stopped in college, and finally late last year I started getting back into reading blogs and whatnot. I noticed a lot of what you’re talking about. Like blogging had just BLOWN UP and seemed to have become just another marketing tool.
So while I’ve been feeling the desire to start writing online again, I’ve been very tentative about it just because the blogging world seems a little intimidating these days. Your post (along with Emily’s) has helped to remind me blogging can still be like what it was then if I make it that way. That I just need to do my own thing and not worry about what anyone else thinks, because ultimately, it’s for me. Thanks for that.
Oh, and the jeans thing? ME. TOO. And I thought I was the only one.
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Yes! Thank you! If I hear one more person complaining about people telling us on Twitter what they had for lunch, I’ll scream! That’s what I like about twittering, blogging, facebooking, etc. I want to know people and the real them, not just what news bulletins they’re reading or what products they were paid to tell us about. You totally hit the nail on the head! Keep it up!
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You said EVERYTHING I had in mind. I love blogging and mostly do it for myself, ranting about life or just talking about my (boring) life. But I like that. I don’t write for people, i do it for me, and if people read me and like what i said or have something to say, that makes me more happy. That is the reason why i loved LiveJournal, because most of the people who are blogging there do it for themselves. I made a lot of friends there but then decided that I wanted my own website and moved out. Conclusion: less visitors, not as much comments but strangely, I don’t mind. Of course I would love to have tons of people comment, but again, writing is to help me understand who i am really and where I want to be in life. Take it or leave it. But I love discovering new bloggers and get to know them, and i mean authentic bloggers like you. So I joined BlogLovin and went under “personal” blogs to find out that MOST of them are not personal, that they all sell products or a trend. That saddens me, but when I get to actually find a website like yours where there is still some fun to blogging, that makes me happy
Hope you are having a great Monday!
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Brittney Reply:
May 2nd, 2011 at 10:56 am
Thank you SO much for that! I agree. I loved my LJ because right — personal blogs were.. you know, personal. We didn’t need writing schedules, series could fade away or be strong, you just had FUN with it and showed your personal growth as you went. I don’t neccessarily shun sponsorships and things, but when a “personal” blog feels like a marketable character (or marketable extension of that writer) is blogging in whatever way they feel elicites the most traffic for their cashflow.. I dont know… rubs me the wrong way and loses the fun!
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Colette Reply:
May 2nd, 2011 at 12:30 pm
Exactly! I mean, if you have your own little business and like to promote it in your blog that’s fine, as long as you blog for the first sake of blogging and sharing your daily experiences. Not just make it an extension of your shop. That makes me run in the opposite direction.
Anyway keep up with the good job
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Hi Brittney!
I stumbled across your blog from over at LoveElycia.com. *waves*
It’s refreshing to find someone telling it like it is out there in the blogosphere. I’m relatively new to blogging; I only started blogging properly back in January and I’m constantly looking at other blogs and sometimes I feel ridiculous because I sit wondering how my own blog should be and why it’s not as interesting. Ultimately though, reading this post has reminded me why I blog; to share my daily life and to reflect on the joys of it. I know some of my posts may not mean anything to someone, but the majority of them mean a lot to me and you have reminded me that, that is equally, if not more, as important. Thank you.
I’m not going to lie, eventually I am hoping my blog will incorporate my (work-in-progress-none-existent-etsy-shop) at some point, but I will ultimately blog for me, first and for most, rather than constantly spamming ‘buy from me HERE’.
It’s nice to meet you, I look forward to reading the rest of your blog
xo Amy
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Brittney Reply:
July 2nd, 2011 at 12:04 pm
Well hello! I just went to your site and it’s down??
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Amy Reply:
July 2nd, 2011 at 9:34 pm
Sorry I changed the url lately. Amended! xo Amy.
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